daMaiLah kaU di saNa haFiz..aL-fatiHah...

yesterday, 31st January 2009 my nephew, Hafizudin passed away.
Ibu got a call at about 1600++ hours from
Kak Lin informing us on the news.
We quickly rushed to Gleneagles to pay our last respect to our dear haFiz...

what saDDened me was...
ibu was planning to visit Hafiz on that very day..
earlier that day I mean..
Ibu asked me to buy "yong tau fOo" to bring to the hospital.
I regretted that we didnt reach there earlier...

how I wish i could see him before he go..
i wish he could have play with Arman again..
I wish he could have some of the Yong Tau Foo that I bought for him..
i wish....

When we reach there, we saw abang Fifi was crying besides arwah because
he wasnt there when arwah passed away..
no one was there except Kak Lin...
things must have been hard for Kak Lin rite now..
Hafiz was the only son in the family..
and her four sisters is missing him every seconds they breath..
all of us misses him....all of us...

you guys must be wondering what arwah was suffering from right??
Well please do read this..
this was taken from arwah's closest cousin's blog...
credits to Ika & Ira...thanx dear

this cute boy name muhammad hafizudin bin m. hafifi.
Hafiz, for short. he's sick. really sick.
he does not have left lung, both of his lung on the right. how's that? i dont know.
keadaan hafiz memang kritikal.
jantung hafiz dah tak sihat lagi.
injap jantung dia dah mula bocor.
disebabkan itu, jantung dia terpaksa bekerja kuat untuk mengepam darah.
ibu bagitahu saiz jantung dia dh expand 3times dr normal size dia.
heartbeat anak kecil 7thn ni dalam keadaan rehat
adalah sama dengan orang normal ketika berlari.
bayangkan pula jika anak kecil ini mula bermain dan berlari.
bayangkan heartbeatnya ketika itu.
doktor sudah mengesahkan tiada apa yang dapat dilakukan lagi.
mak ngah dan pak ngah dah nekad tak nak undergo surgery, sebab kalau dilakukan pun,
hafiz akan berada di bawah intensive care.
tak adil untuk kanak-kanak sepertinya untuk terbaring di
atas katil instead bermain bersama-sama kanak-kanak sebayanya.
all we can do now is wait. and pray.

The doctor said it had nothing to do with his heart whatsoever..
it was because HE WAS VERY TIRED...
but to me...
Allah lebih menyayangi die..."KUN FAYAKUN"
its better to think that way...

When I kissed him for the last time...
he looked like he was sleeping peacefully...
and it had been two days since
that I couldnt sleep remembering that he had slept forever...

I was not that close to arwah....
but it came to mind suddenly what if
its Arman...
I couldnt stop thinkng about that..

Would I have the strength of Kak Lin
who went through all the sickness until arwah's last breath..
Would I have the courage of arwah's sisters to
always be besides him until the end..
Would I be ready to let arwah go..
the same way arwahs' family did..

Thinking of it...
i regretted for not being close to arwah..
being a mother now..
proves to me that you'll do whatever you could
to protect the love of your life..
you'll love everyone arounds you even if
that someone hurt you again n again...
you'll pray constantly to Allah
to give you the chances to love them whole heartedly...

in short..being a mother made me realized..
there's no limitation to love...
cherish those you love every seconds you have..
cause you'll never know when
they'll leave you...or
when you'll leave them

that's why i decided to blog this...
to my suprise I dont even have any ideas before this
on what should i put up on my blog...

Ya Allah..berilah keluarga arwah di ketika ini dan
hari2 yg akan datang kekuatan untuk melalui ujian Mu..
berilah mereka ketenangan untuk menerima
Qada' & Qadar ketentuan Mu Ya Allah...

At least we know arwah's sickness and misery had ended...
at least we were given opportunities to cherish
and loved arwah for the rest of his life..
Allah has better plan for him...
he left us all with unforgettable memories...

pergilah sayang...damailah engkau di sana...

smoga roh-nya dicucuri rahmat
dan ditempatkan di kalangan orang2 yg soleh...AMIN